All that is striking and beautiful is not always good but that which is good is always beautiful.
DR PREMA DHANRAJ
In anyone else such holy gratitude would be looked at with suspicion. After all it isn't like it's a tan, a breakout of acne, or dark circles. Her face is taut in places, twisted in others, wrinkled, stretched and scarred. But when you sit across Dr Prema Dhanraj, HoD, Department of Plastic Surgery, Christian Medical College and Hospital, Vellore, what really strikes you is how comfortable she is in her skin. When she talks, you listen, when she laughs, you laugh with her. And what you remember is her grace, her courage, and her love of life.
At the age of eight, a stove burst in Prema's face resulting in 50 per cent burns. She was so burnt, that her neck had melted and her chin was touching her chest. For two days surgeons at the Christian Medical College Hospital (CMCH), Vellore, struggled to put the oxygen tube down her throat without which an operation was not possible.
Prayer and... a promise
While Prema was battling death, her mother, Rosie Stella Dhanraj, sent up a prayer from the little church at the hospital. She promised not only to make a plastic surgeon out of her daughter, but also make sure she served the same hospital, if only God let her live.
Keeping that promise wasn't easy. Not for Prema. Not for her mother. "There were times when I would cry and cry. I didn't want to study," remembers Prema. Schoolmates would shun her and call her `the devil'. But she had a choice to make as the oldest — she could be dependent on her siblings, or make them proud of her. "My mother never forced me to do anything. She'd just make the options very clear."
Prema never saw a mirror during those days. The look of horror, the repulsion and pity on people's face didn't make sense. When she took the bus people would freeze on the steps. "It was almost funny," she says. "I was always worried they'd keep standing there and I would miss my bus," she laughs.
One of the difficult choices Prema made was to stop all surgery. First, medical science in the late 1960s wasn't what it is today. And then, after 14 reconstructive surgeries, Prema simply wanted to get on with life and she did. After earning a graduation and an MBBS, she went to work at CMCH, Vellore, under Dr L.B.M. Joseph, the very same surgeon who had treated her!
In her 26-year career Prema has collected many accolades. Recently she received the "Triumph of Human Spirit Award" from the Rotary Club of Ambattur, Chennai. She has travelled around the world, taught plastic surgeons in Norway, Kenya and Tanzania. She has not only trained Ethiopia's first plastic surgeon but is currently also setting up its first burns unit.
Skilled helping hands
"God might have taken away my looks, but he's more than made up. He has given me such gifted hands, I am really skilled with my hands," she says, snapping a finger to show how fast she is. Today as a leading plastic surgeon, Prema sees scores of patients.
And if you presume that she might scoff at those who come to get that nose a little straighter, the breasts a little bigger or smaller, you are wrong. "I know how serious even pimples can be. It might not be for you and me, but who are we to judge what it means to someone else. I can't dismiss any complaint, because I know how much I craved for little, little things," she says. In India, as elsewhere, there is considerable social stigma for girls with small breasts or breasts that are too large, she says. It leads to a lot of emotional and psychological trauma. Today the technology, the medical knowledge and skill that wasn't available to Prema when she needed it, is at her fingertips.
Sharing courage
Prema also does a considerable amount of reconstructive surgery, particularly for the `Smile Train' project that does free cleft lip and cleft palate operations. She has also started a small foundation called Agni Raksha in Bangalore. It is for burn victims to come together, earn some income through handwork, but more importantly to meet people like them. "It's nice to know that you are not alone. That there might be others who are worse off."
Her courage, her strength she ascribes to her mother. During all the years, Prema has never seen her cry. "I knew she had cried, her eyes would be red and swollen when she'd come out from the prayer room. God's given me such a wonderful family, I don't mind going through everything all over again, if I can also be born into the same family. If I can still be the same person today," she says. Prema's mother is no more, but she did live to see her become a doctor. She shares a close bond with her siblings who she says are really proud of her achievements. "They tell me, we are jealous you are winning awards every other day," she says.
For Prema there's a lot to do. For starters extend Agni Raksha's work. There is also talking about herself and being photographed. She doesn't squirm, she's as conscious as anyone else. In fact less because her face is actually an inspiration to many. When patients want too much, are too depressed, Prema says her juniors bring them to look at her. "I tell them look at my face, it can't be worse than this."
But looking good is important. "They tell me I am the best dressed person in the hospital. And I live up to the compliment. When actresses can do so much to themselves, can't you and I be the best we can?"
Dr Prema Dhanraj doesn't hold the smallest grudge against fate, because she doesn't need to. She is the best she can be.
One of her patients puts it in perspective: "All that is striking and beautiful is not always good but that which is good is always beautiful."
